edema, for those of you who don't know, is basically water retention. it can make someone who, a day or two previously appeared starved, look completely huge. in my case, i look about 6 months pregnant, have cankles, and my wrists/fingers are completely swollen.
it sucks. HARDCORE.
consequently, feeling so incredibly awful about myself leads to self-harm yeahhhhhh hot curling irons on skin.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Friday, December 25, 2009
ooh more learning while being in PHP
- how much i love michael jackson!
- some other sweet amazing bands
- i'm pretty much a master bart rider now
- of course a lot about nutrition.
- learned about how much love and compassion i do have for others
- 3 words: bear valley trail!
- bunch of other stuff
a few things i've learned at PHP
things i have learned, which are important to note:
- a person can have two opposing feelings at the same time, e.g. i can feel sad but happy in the same moment
- my body DOES in fact use food and metabolizes it
- as much as it is still hard to accept, and i am still questioning this one, and this IS the hardest one right now to be okay with, but being at a little healthier weight does not equal fat/ugly, even though sometimes i feel like it does
- people in general are extremely narcissistic; just because my dad or mom is in a bad mood, it doesn't mean i have done something wrong. sometimes when someone around me is in a bad mood i automatically think it is because something i have done, when in reality it's usually something completely different.
- i have learned a lot of things to apply as a mom. when my child needs to go for a walk, i would want to go and not turn back until they feel okay to do so. it's really important just to let my child talk and not tell them, "you SHOULD feel this way..." but instead, "i totally understand..." and "that must be really hard...." etc.
- another big one is that when i am having a really hard time, those are the times i need to reach out to someone the most. like, i know it makes sense but i never really practiced it before...now that i have, i totally get it.
- feeling like no one around me is acknowledging my being is probably my biggest trigger...problem with growing up in a family of 7 kids...
- the importance of being honest...
- most of life is, in fact, not happy. but there are still happy moments. it's really okay to live a life that is completely honest...that things aren't sunshine and roses all the time.
Friday, December 11, 2009
Life Sucks
Oh, life has never sucked so much.
I cry in the morning because my fatness is overwhelming. and I hate myself p.s.
Yesterday at PHP I had to sign a fucking contract about following the meal plan 100% and working with my D and being all cooperative and whatnot or else I would be discharged. Efffffff.
But then there was all the "come to jesus" stuff and everybody was all inspired by me blah blah blah this sucks so much.
Anyway so since I had to sign the contract yesterday, and I have today and this weekend off (so=three days of NO PHP support) D and I just decided I have to have X amount of ensures everyday. Easier than real food. Gaaaaaaay. This sucks this sucks this sucks I hate everyone in the world but mostly myself fuuuuuuuuuuckzorz. HATE.
HATE
I cry in the morning because my fatness is overwhelming. and I hate myself p.s.
Yesterday at PHP I had to sign a fucking contract about following the meal plan 100% and working with my D and being all cooperative and whatnot or else I would be discharged. Efffffff.
But then there was all the "come to jesus" stuff and everybody was all inspired by me blah blah blah this sucks so much.
Anyway so since I had to sign the contract yesterday, and I have today and this weekend off (so=three days of NO PHP support) D and I just decided I have to have X amount of ensures everyday. Easier than real food. Gaaaaaaay. This sucks this sucks this sucks I hate everyone in the world but mostly myself fuuuuuuuuuuckzorz. HATE.
HATE
Friday, December 4, 2009
5 meals, 4 snacks
In a row.
Does. anyone. KNOW. how. hard. that. is.
Yesterday's breakfast+morning snack+lunch+afternoon snack+dinner (at Susan's, there was not a snowball's chance in hell i could have done it otherwise)+this morning's breakfast+snack+lunch+snack.
That is a whole TON o' food kids. I don't think ANYONE would like feeling so full. Like, I fell asleep right after dinner (during the movie) cause i just couldn't handle the conscious feeling of being so full. Gosssssshhhh i wish I could just impart that feeling to "normal" people. It's like, the most ridiculous thing ever.
So, you may be wondering, "She's been in the program for almost 2 months now, why is this a new thing for her?"
And the answer to that, I plead the fifth.
Major breakthroughs today man.
But as of this moment, I do love life.
Does. anyone. KNOW. how. hard. that. is.
Yesterday's breakfast+morning snack+lunch+afternoon snack+dinner (at Susan's, there was not a snowball's chance in hell i could have done it otherwise)+this morning's breakfast+snack+lunch+snack.
That is a whole TON o' food kids. I don't think ANYONE would like feeling so full. Like, I fell asleep right after dinner (during the movie) cause i just couldn't handle the conscious feeling of being so full. Gosssssshhhh i wish I could just impart that feeling to "normal" people. It's like, the most ridiculous thing ever.
So, you may be wondering, "She's been in the program for almost 2 months now, why is this a new thing for her?"
And the answer to that, I plead the fifth.
Major breakthroughs today man.
But as of this moment, I do love life.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Saturday Night Soliloquy
I feel enlightened right now. Moments of feeling like this are fleeting, so I thought I would try to describe it.
I think just the idea of being happy is what is nice about it. I really can picture myself in that space. It's such an incredibly nice feeling. I've felt it before. It's really empowering, also. Like-- I can make my life whatever I want it to be. I can live where I want. I can pursue any endeavor I want. I can care about myself. I can love myself for who I am.
It's just such an incredibly happy idea.
After a few moments of feeling like this, insert fear. Fear of being like, FAT. Because of course there's no way I could actually feel happy and be at a healthy weight. Gosh, how could I actually accept myself that way? Ugh. I'm working on it. But I do believe it's out there at least. That's definitely progress.
One of the greatest things about going through this is that it has definitely opened my eyes to some things I want out of life. I think before I was just so, blah. Like, leave me alone I don't care about my life I have no goals or ambitions life sucks. But now, I definitely want some things. I can totally see myself in five or ten years or whatever being an awesome guitar playing, German/French speaking, boat-owning therapist! Who lives in Sausalito and scuba dives and reads To Kill a Mockingbird with her beautiful children.
Sweet dude. Sweet.
I think just the idea of being happy is what is nice about it. I really can picture myself in that space. It's such an incredibly nice feeling. I've felt it before. It's really empowering, also. Like-- I can make my life whatever I want it to be. I can live where I want. I can pursue any endeavor I want. I can care about myself. I can love myself for who I am.
It's just such an incredibly happy idea.
After a few moments of feeling like this, insert fear. Fear of being like, FAT. Because of course there's no way I could actually feel happy and be at a healthy weight. Gosh, how could I actually accept myself that way? Ugh. I'm working on it. But I do believe it's out there at least. That's definitely progress.
One of the greatest things about going through this is that it has definitely opened my eyes to some things I want out of life. I think before I was just so, blah. Like, leave me alone I don't care about my life I have no goals or ambitions life sucks. But now, I definitely want some things. I can totally see myself in five or ten years or whatever being an awesome guitar playing, German/French speaking, boat-owning therapist! Who lives in Sausalito and scuba dives and reads To Kill a Mockingbird with her beautiful children.
Sweet dude. Sweet.
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Friday, October 9, 2009
So Long, Farewell...
This is kinda sad. I don't know whether or not I will post before Monday, but after that...who knows? For reals. Cause check this sweet vacay I get to go on by clicking this sentence. Sounds super fun I bet to all of you, huh?
It's been an emotionally draining, hard week. But this is my decision, and I feel like it is the right one. I want to be "happy and healthy and whole!" Especially when I get married. Which probably won't happen when we had originally planned. But this is more important.
Say hello to STRONG.
It's been an emotionally draining, hard week. But this is my decision, and I feel like it is the right one. I want to be "happy and healthy and whole!" Especially when I get married. Which probably won't happen when we had originally planned. But this is more important.
Say hello to STRONG.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Happy 22nd Baby Doll!
Such a good birthday...went over to B-rad's, present was amaaaaazing!!!! Then to St G-izzle where we went to the temple and watched the J Smith movie and I cried a whole lot, then to SPOON ME!!!!!!!!!!! best place ever cause it's 85 cals for a bowl of divine-ness lol, then to institute, then to Pastry Pub where I got my fave salad, then to B-rad's sister's house where she gave me an amazing scarf and paring knife!, then back to B-rad's to read/finish our book :-D I love B-rad....
a sad story of a truck
Sunday morning B-rad wakes me up. I smile. He lays beside me.
I shower, wash, brush, blow-dry, make-up, dress, perfume.
Breakfast of toast and juice. Sunday morning sessions with his cousins. We cuddle.
Leave immediately thereafter to weave through city traffic to find a park spot in the parking garage. Walk through rainy weather, eventually to end up in our seats.
Wonderful talks. 4 p.m. when it ends, B-rad is especially hungry. We discuss the invitation to eat dinner (spaghetti) with his extended family. The idea is uncomfortable. Let's just stop and get some popcorn and fruit? Okay, he says.
It's 5 p.m. once we finally make it back to the cousins'. His hunger feels insatiable. I feel scared. I finish changing and come downstairs. "We think we have B-rad convinced," they tell me. "I dunno about that...." I say. B-rad comes downstairs from changing. He looks at me. "I hope that's okay..." he says. I give him A Look.
We sit down. Spaghetti sucks. Toast sucks. Water sucks. You suck. I suck. I smile. They smile. We talk.
5:30 p.m. We exchange departing "Thank yous" and "Hope you'll come agains!"
In the car. B-rad: "I hope that was OK, I was so hungry!"
Silence for half an hour.
B-rad has tears on his face. His chin trembles uncontrollably.
I love him.
I shower, wash, brush, blow-dry, make-up, dress, perfume.
Breakfast of toast and juice. Sunday morning sessions with his cousins. We cuddle.
Leave immediately thereafter to weave through city traffic to find a park spot in the parking garage. Walk through rainy weather, eventually to end up in our seats.
Wonderful talks. 4 p.m. when it ends, B-rad is especially hungry. We discuss the invitation to eat dinner (spaghetti) with his extended family. The idea is uncomfortable. Let's just stop and get some popcorn and fruit? Okay, he says.
It's 5 p.m. once we finally make it back to the cousins'. His hunger feels insatiable. I feel scared. I finish changing and come downstairs. "We think we have B-rad convinced," they tell me. "I dunno about that...." I say. B-rad comes downstairs from changing. He looks at me. "I hope that's okay..." he says. I give him A Look.
We sit down. Spaghetti sucks. Toast sucks. Water sucks. You suck. I suck. I smile. They smile. We talk.
5:30 p.m. We exchange departing "Thank yous" and "Hope you'll come agains!"
In the car. B-rad: "I hope that was OK, I was so hungry!"
Silence for half an hour.
B-rad has tears on his face. His chin trembles uncontrollably.
I love him.
Salt Lake Sojourn
I tried to think of a good New Era caption.... any ideas?
Chris and Kal came and met us there! :D We went to the Clark Planetarium and saw a movie in the dome theater of Extreme Planets....and here there are on Mars.
Hamburger phones at Urban Outfitters at the Gateway are awesome. I'm cool?
Hunkalicious.
Great, fun trip!
Friday, September 25, 2009
Peregrination to Provo, Remarkably Rare Rock, Super Support, and Fantastic Fall!
First order of business: Happy [29th] Birthday to the amazing woman who expelled me from her ute. You are amazing momma!
So, I wrote earlier that I wasn't going to post a picture, but I ended up learning a little bit about my camera, and here is what you get...not super fantastic photos that do the Ring any justice...but whatevs
Ahh, spectacular...
^girl's best friend^
So many people wrote on my FB which was really really cool
You can't really tell, but the leaves are starting to turn colors :)
The morning of...The Proposal
Off to Provo we goooooo
Yay.
B-rad just got off work. = Bye.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
The Proposal!
So....I am officially engaged. It is pretty amazing. :)
B-rad picked me up and blindfolded me and drove me to an unknown location, and when we got out of the car we walked a short distance, and I heard violin hymn music! I love it. Anyway, and then B-rad took the blindfold off and there were tons of candles and roses and rose petals on the table and two "champagne glasses" and Martinelli's and he had gotten my favorite salad from Pastry Pub 'cause he is amazing like that! And we talked and it was a perfect night and we could see so many stars. And when we finished eating, we tried to dance but I am too much of an awkward dancer, combined with the fact that the CD kept skipping, it was just rather comical. Anyway, then he sang this song to me and I started crying so much because I really really love him and he is more perfect for me than anyone. At the end he got down on his knee and then I was really really crying and he asked me if I would marry him....and the rest is history!
So for the past hour we've been calling like everyone and texting everyone and I will post pictures of the ring tomorrow!
And right now on my facebook I feel soooooo much love from so many people commenting on my status, it is incredible, like even people I didn't even think would notice or say anything of course! It's so incredible.
B-rad picked me up and blindfolded me and drove me to an unknown location, and when we got out of the car we walked a short distance, and I heard violin hymn music! I love it. Anyway, and then B-rad took the blindfold off and there were tons of candles and roses and rose petals on the table and two "champagne glasses" and Martinelli's and he had gotten my favorite salad from Pastry Pub 'cause he is amazing like that! And we talked and it was a perfect night and we could see so many stars. And when we finished eating, we tried to dance but I am too much of an awkward dancer, combined with the fact that the CD kept skipping, it was just rather comical. Anyway, then he sang this song to me and I started crying so much because I really really love him and he is more perfect for me than anyone. At the end he got down on his knee and then I was really really crying and he asked me if I would marry him....and the rest is history!
So for the past hour we've been calling like everyone and texting everyone and I will post pictures of the ring tomorrow!
And right now on my facebook I feel soooooo much love from so many people commenting on my status, it is incredible, like even people I didn't even think would notice or say anything of course! It's so incredible.
Monday, September 21, 2009
Hollllllerrrrrrr
I'm gonna make this post as phlegmatic as possible.
So, this weekend B-rad and I headed to the 'vo to visit his cousin who works at Jared's. After only looking at a couple of rings, we found the perfect, most beautiful one. It is incredibly unique and beautiful and according to all the sincere people who worked there, it was undoubtedly the best ring in the store. This ring is perfect, I am telling you guys. PERFECT.
But B-rad only let me wear it that night and Sunday to church :( Now he is keeping it captive until he plans the perfect way to give it to me. He called my dad on Sunday night, too, and I hear that went well.
After ring shopping, we got a chance to visit my favorite JNB friend, which was great. I love her. The rest of the time we were with some of his mission companions, which was pretty fun. Anth is super legit, a wayyy good host.
Ride home helped B-rad and I grow in our relationship...urgh, a disagreement, but we kinda worked through it.
Pictures of the weekend to follow, but no pictures of the ring. Pictures just won't do it justice, you see. Gotta be in mah RL to experience that one, folks...
So, this weekend B-rad and I headed to the 'vo to visit his cousin who works at Jared's. After only looking at a couple of rings, we found the perfect, most beautiful one. It is incredibly unique and beautiful and according to all the sincere people who worked there, it was undoubtedly the best ring in the store. This ring is perfect, I am telling you guys. PERFECT.
But B-rad only let me wear it that night and Sunday to church :( Now he is keeping it captive until he plans the perfect way to give it to me. He called my dad on Sunday night, too, and I hear that went well.
After ring shopping, we got a chance to visit my favorite JNB friend, which was great. I love her. The rest of the time we were with some of his mission companions, which was pretty fun. Anth is super legit, a wayyy good host.
Ride home helped B-rad and I grow in our relationship...urgh, a disagreement, but we kinda worked through it.
Pictures of the weekend to follow, but no pictures of the ring. Pictures just won't do it justice, you see. Gotta be in mah RL to experience that one, folks...
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Kick Ed's ass today. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass.Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass.Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass. Kick Ed's ass.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Terrifically Tantalizing Tuesday
Today was Tuesday.
Today I had a pretty clear vision of what my life would be like in ten years when I am all healthy and happy and ED free. It was just a flash of picture in my mind.
It was a late fall afternoon, probably that time around 5:00 when the sun is still up but starting to set. And you feel and smell the fall air and the trees are turning orange, yellow, and red. And I was wearing a deep red knit sweater and I had silver earrings in and dark blue jeans (probably like size 4 or 6 :) ) and some dark brown shoes like my Sketchers and my hair was darker and about shoulder-length, and I was sitting in some youth league bleachers with a little girl around 2 or 3 years old and we were watching some kids play a sport, but I didn't really see what sport in that picture.
And it was so happy and content.
Can't wait.
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Pictures from this weekend....commentary to follow tomorrow...
I.am.vain.
Quasimoto?
Tyler. He kept crawling under my legs and sitting in my lap. What a sweetie.
Kate is a doll.
:)
Friday night we went on a hike.
A deer that let us get super close to it!
No crust, please. (No mayo, or cheese, for that matter) :-D Also notice the apples and laffy taffy! They didn't have any purple ones at the store...what a crime..but the "sparkles jerry cherry" was good, too.
<3 :)
Thursday, September 10, 2009
yeah yeah, post whore tonight but you better listen up...
'cause i've been doing some serious thinkin', thanks to a good trophy wife friend i have. :)
some people let this take over who they are. literally. i feel like that was me today. i let it invade my nearly every thought. thoughts lead to actions. i can control what i think. i CAN. you know, i never really thought of it that way. i have the choice to think "oh gosh, so fat so fat so fat." or to not have that thought. although of course it is hard to eliminate those thoughts, it is also my choice whether to act on those thoughts. i can choose to treat my body the way Heavenly Father wants me to treat it. healthy and happy healthy and happy healthy and happy. i CAN give myself what i need.
i was shaking so badly today.
i got off the phone with my mom and i look at the phone in my hand and it is shaking. i want to drive somewhere and put something in my body i can handle. something cold cold cold with a decent amount of sugar in it to give me energy. but i just sit there. in my car. i feel like i can't move. and i just sit there in the driver's seat curled up. with my head in my knees and sit there.
this scene is not unfamiliar for the past TWO point FIVE YEARS.
lots of times i think, "i know i'm not choosing happiness. but what is the big deal about not being so happy?" i will tell you. because if you DON'T choose happiness, you aren't choosing just not being happy-go-lucky, you are choosing guilt, despair, loneliness, and every negative feeling! and those are horrible!!!!! i hope that makes sense.
i just kinda wish i had a clear image of what my body really looks like. :/
tomorrow is the beginning of my life! tomorrow i won't weigh myself! i will just be happy. and you know what song i will think about when i need to remind myself to feel happy? This One.
some people let this take over who they are. literally. i feel like that was me today. i let it invade my nearly every thought. thoughts lead to actions. i can control what i think. i CAN. you know, i never really thought of it that way. i have the choice to think "oh gosh, so fat so fat so fat." or to not have that thought. although of course it is hard to eliminate those thoughts, it is also my choice whether to act on those thoughts. i can choose to treat my body the way Heavenly Father wants me to treat it. healthy and happy healthy and happy healthy and happy. i CAN give myself what i need.
i was shaking so badly today.
i got off the phone with my mom and i look at the phone in my hand and it is shaking. i want to drive somewhere and put something in my body i can handle. something cold cold cold with a decent amount of sugar in it to give me energy. but i just sit there. in my car. i feel like i can't move. and i just sit there in the driver's seat curled up. with my head in my knees and sit there.
this scene is not unfamiliar for the past TWO point FIVE YEARS.
lots of times i think, "i know i'm not choosing happiness. but what is the big deal about not being so happy?" i will tell you. because if you DON'T choose happiness, you aren't choosing just not being happy-go-lucky, you are choosing guilt, despair, loneliness, and every negative feeling! and those are horrible!!!!! i hope that makes sense.
i just kinda wish i had a clear image of what my body really looks like. :/
tomorrow is the beginning of my life! tomorrow i won't weigh myself! i will just be happy. and you know what song i will think about when i need to remind myself to feel happy? This One.
Aquaintance with Yours Truly
I've been entertaining some ideas about what to share on this fine Thursday afternoon, and after some thought I decided that you dear people would want to know about "the outside" of what makes Me, although small details you can gather from reading older posts; for example, that I am from the Bay (holla atchya peeps). Anyway, today is a list-kind-of-day (what day isn't? I love lists!).
1. Biology major. I love science. Incredibly fascinating to me. Not difficult. But I mean, now that I think about it, I really just love learning in general. This semester, my German class is my favorite. Love history. Love English. Er, like math but sometimes it is hard for me to understand. Love music....this seems like it could be more than one item on the list....
2. I speak Spanish.
3. I believe purple laffy taffies are one of life's great pleasures.
4. Did an internship in South Carolina summer 2008. One of the best and worst experiences of my life.
5. 2nd of a whopping 7 children. Our fam is epic.
6. I believe cloud watching is something that should be done regularly. (Today we learned the German word for cloud! Die Wolke.)
7. In life for realsies it makes me really uncomfortable talking about myself for too long. In 7th grade I distinctly remember making friends in P.E. and I didn't share anything about myself for the whole first semester! I am learning though that it is important to do that! There is a balance between being self-centered and super closed I guess. :-/
8. I totally pick up on other people's little weird behaviors (the ones I like), and I don't even know if they know it! Two examples: B-rad's hand gesturing. Well, actually I won't share the other one cause it's just so weird!
9. I play OBOEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE yeah check that fools. It's pretty much the ultimate instrument right up there with harp and cello.
10. Size 7.5 OR 8 feet. Relatively small for someone 5'10" but my mom has small feet. Never pierced ears or anything for that matter. Dyed my hair for the first time this summer, it turned out FAB thank you very much. :-D hahahahahaaaaaaaa.
Predict tonight to be not so great. Today has been not so great. Like I mentioned yesterday?, had Gah-roop yesterday. Me no likey mucho.
1. Biology major. I love science. Incredibly fascinating to me. Not difficult. But I mean, now that I think about it, I really just love learning in general. This semester, my German class is my favorite. Love history. Love English. Er, like math but sometimes it is hard for me to understand. Love music....this seems like it could be more than one item on the list....
2. I speak Spanish.
3. I believe purple laffy taffies are one of life's great pleasures.
4. Did an internship in South Carolina summer 2008. One of the best and worst experiences of my life.
5. 2nd of a whopping 7 children. Our fam is epic.
6. I believe cloud watching is something that should be done regularly. (Today we learned the German word for cloud! Die Wolke.)
7. In life for realsies it makes me really uncomfortable talking about myself for too long. In 7th grade I distinctly remember making friends in P.E. and I didn't share anything about myself for the whole first semester! I am learning though that it is important to do that! There is a balance between being self-centered and super closed I guess. :-/
8. I totally pick up on other people's little weird behaviors (the ones I like), and I don't even know if they know it! Two examples: B-rad's hand gesturing. Well, actually I won't share the other one cause it's just so weird!
9. I play OBOEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE yeah check that fools. It's pretty much the ultimate instrument right up there with harp and cello.
10. Size 7.5 OR 8 feet. Relatively small for someone 5'10" but my mom has small feet. Never pierced ears or anything for that matter. Dyed my hair for the first time this summer, it turned out FAB thank you very much. :-D hahahahahaaaaaaaa.
Predict tonight to be not so great. Today has been not so great. Like I mentioned yesterday?, had Gah-roop yesterday. Me no likey mucho.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
It's SO late!
It is really late. Unfortunately I just have so much going on in my ol' cranial skull. So I want to make this to the point.
Today, B-rad met J. They spoke for 10 minutes-ish. Then he went to math. J and I talked. Lots of things hit me today. One thing, for example, is that I say, "Oh, I want to be doing a lot better by the time I get married." But also there are many, many things to take into account that undoubtedly will deter that. Comparing myself to other brides is definitely a factor; fitting into that wonderful size 2 wedding dress; and of course, the "wedding night" and you-- er, I,-- want to look super hot. MOTHER OF PEARL WHAT IS A GIRL TO DO.
More importantly, though, is something J said about how it's like, a "functional alcoholic" would be all like telling their fiance, "Oh, I'm recovering and I go to meetings and I'm doing a lot better," but that night they get wasted and nothing is truly different. Then she had to be all like philosophical and hit me to the core and be like, "If you had to pick between B-rad and your e.d. which would you choose?" And I was all like, bla bla bla I don't want to get faaaaaaaaaaat life sucks except I love B-rad so yeah. So now I have a really important goal for this week that I am going to take really seriously.
Oh, ok, so then tonight B-rad was amazing AS ALWAYS and after institute he helped me with my German homework which I didn't think I was even going to need help on but actually I needed help on every single sentence, ha! and he was so nice about it like telling me I was doing really good on it, anyway I digress because really what was amazing was that after we read another chapter of Chronicles of Narnia, he was all like, "Meeting J with you was the highlight of my day! She is so great, I want to help you so much, I wanted to stay with you guys today!" Like, is there anyone more perfect out there? Honestly?
In conclusion: tomorrow=group. No further commentary needed. :-/ Wish me luck?
Today, B-rad met J. They spoke for 10 minutes-ish. Then he went to math. J and I talked. Lots of things hit me today. One thing, for example, is that I say, "Oh, I want to be doing a lot better by the time I get married." But also there are many, many things to take into account that undoubtedly will deter that. Comparing myself to other brides is definitely a factor; fitting into that wonderful size 2 wedding dress; and of course, the "wedding night" and you-- er, I,-- want to look super hot. MOTHER OF PEARL WHAT IS A GIRL TO DO.
More importantly, though, is something J said about how it's like, a "functional alcoholic" would be all like telling their fiance, "Oh, I'm recovering and I go to meetings and I'm doing a lot better," but that night they get wasted and nothing is truly different. Then she had to be all like philosophical and hit me to the core and be like, "If you had to pick between B-rad and your e.d. which would you choose?" And I was all like, bla bla bla I don't want to get faaaaaaaaaaat life sucks except I love B-rad so yeah. So now I have a really important goal for this week that I am going to take really seriously.
Oh, ok, so then tonight B-rad was amazing AS ALWAYS and after institute he helped me with my German homework which I didn't think I was even going to need help on but actually I needed help on every single sentence, ha! and he was so nice about it like telling me I was doing really good on it, anyway I digress because really what was amazing was that after we read another chapter of Chronicles of Narnia, he was all like, "Meeting J with you was the highlight of my day! She is so great, I want to help you so much, I wanted to stay with you guys today!" Like, is there anyone more perfect out there? Honestly?
In conclusion: tomorrow=group. No further commentary needed. :-/ Wish me luck?
Monday, September 7, 2009
For the inquiring minds as to what B-rad looks like...
Ummm....yeah, I was really tired......but we are so cute :)
He is driving his super hot old school truck.
Cheesy smile :)Our Song :)
This Labor Day weekend has been really great. Friday evening John and Amy went elk scouting up on Cedar Mountain, and so I tended the lil 'uns til about 10:30 p.m. when B-rad picked me up and we headed to St. G-izzle. It was definitely a spur of the moment thing, and with anyone I have ever dated in the past I would have declined the invite, because I was so tired!, but I always want to be with B-rad and I'm so glad I went. So we got down there round about 11:15 and we went hot tubbing with three of his old mission friends: Amy, Petty, and Lynn. It was really fun! Came in around 12:30 and er, B-rad and I went to bed around 3:30 a.m.....(edited those three hours for viewer content hahahahahahaha) But really, we are doing really really well in that area so don't even fret.
Saturday we played rock band all morning, then B-rad and I came back 'cause he had to work at 1:15 p.m. and I was going to see Julie & Julia with my friend Kaelee. It was REALLY cute!!! I'm so glad I got to see it!!! Kaelee is way way cool, too. Anyway, then that afternoon just got random crap done and watched the news and some of the football going on and I forget all the stuff but B-rad got off work later that evening and we watched most of Pirate's of the Caribbean with his brother Hank who I think will be a great b.i.l.
Sunday was good...both yesterday and today I've gotten some great sleep :-D Anyway, went to church with B-rad. Sunday School was really good! Lol, I say that because let's be honest! Sunday School in a student ward can sometimes be hard to pay attention to! After church took 'nother nap. MMMMM love Sunday naps. Went to his house for dinner. Man, I can't even TELL you how good I am doing this weekend. Because I love him and he helps me so much. Ping pong afterwards. I love playing ping pong with him. Then game night. Then we actually came home around 10:30 and talked in his car for quite awhile (yes, we WERE actually talking).
This morning I talked to meina mutti (german for my mommy) for awhile and talked about engagement stuff. But also about how amazing it is that B-rad is so right for me. Like, not many guys could handle what I've thrown out at him. And he has helped me so much. And so today I was listening to Pandora and the song came on that B-rad sang to me. It's called Your Guardian Angel by Red Jump Suit Apparatus and I literally started crying. Like, my feelings were indescribably strong for how much I love him.
Today= visiting B-rad at work with a girl I met at church yesterday! :-D Anyway I have to go do that like, er, NOW, and I am not even ready....uh oh!
Love you.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Never Want a Day Like That Again....
So, yeah. Yesterday sucked hardcore.
But Brady got off work. And made everything okay.
Right now= listening to Wicked. "I couldn't be happier....because happiness is what happens when all your dreams come true..." Class in 45 mins. Then work noon to five. Then babysit five to ten. Then hang out with Brady? Maybe. OOOh Jack Johnson's Talk of the Town song just came onto Pandora! Love it. Check it out.
Heart you guys.
But Brady got off work. And made everything okay.
Right now= listening to Wicked. "I couldn't be happier....because happiness is what happens when all your dreams come true..." Class in 45 mins. Then work noon to five. Then babysit five to ten. Then hang out with Brady? Maybe. OOOh Jack Johnson's Talk of the Town song just came onto Pandora! Love it. Check it out.
Heart you guys.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Mother of Pearl
UUUUUUUUUUguuuguuuugh. Today is no good. So I am writing a poem.
There is a meany Ed,
Who lives inside my head.
He says, "Please don't get fed."
I wish that he were dead.
My body I so hate,
And in my mind I state:
Please don't touch that plate.
Bathroom after I ate.
Maybe one day there'll be
A thought inside of me
That says, "I'm great, you see!"
Til then, I feel heavy.
Monday, August 31, 2009
Weekend Wonders
This weekend was wonderful! Babysitting went extremely well; Amy and John went to St. G-izzle from 5 p.m. on Friday to 5 p.m. on Saturday. All the while I watched the kids and we had probably the best time ever. Woke up Saturday morning, got soccer pictures taken, went to the library, went to the Art Festival, had lunch, came home and watched The Great Mouse Detective, went to the dollar store where they got toys and we played with those for a little while and then played 9 card! What a fun day! That night B-rad and I watched...Minority Report and talked and did other stuff but I forget everything so yeah. Saturday was rockin'.
Sunday was great as well. Got up, got ready (the picture is of me when I actually look presentable, i.e. on Church Days!), had my daily morning oatmeal :), went to B-rad's around 11, we read scriptures together (Alma 47), we read some more Chronicles of Narnia, talked, had a snack (toast w/ jam, a small peach, I am doing so good!), made out, hahahahahaha I just had to throw that in there, went to church at 1 p.m. B-rad spoke. It was good, but he was the first speaker and afterwards he came and sat by me and we didn't pay attention to anything the other speakers said because we were too busy discussing baby names. He approves of Grace, Jane, and Claire, but I really want an Elle too but he doesn't like it so it will be a middle name. We pretty much agree on boys' names except he likes the name Tim and I am sorry, no child of mine will be named Tim. Anyway, you can see how this conversation was extremely distracting to our listening of the Sacrament talks.
So then after church he taught a mission prep class and I took a MUCH NEEDED nap. :-D Then at 6 he picked me up for the fireside but we were both hungry by then so we decided to nix that idea (okay, we have gone to all of them so far, give us some slack!) and we just went to his house and had dinner. I did pretty well! Then we played a diverting game of ping pong where he used his left hand against me and I almost won. It's on now. I am going to become a better ping pong player than him. Then we read more and then talked and made out and then his brother wanted to watch Chronicles of Narnia and then B-rad dropped me off at home and gosh, he is just so amazing because I can really talk to him about everything and what is better is that he actually asks me about it so yeah and he wants to meet J lol like really badly which I think is funny! And anyway he also said that he thinks Dec. would be better than Spring Break and I do, too, because we still have FOUR WHOLE MONTHS before December. Lalalala so that was this weekend and I love B-rad :-D
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Back-to-School Blues
Well, okay, so I'm not really blue. I think this was actually the first time I was able to tear myself away from Home without having a mini-breakdown upon the time of departure; however, I am a little sad this amazing summer has come to a close and the school year and everything else that entails is upon us.
But before all that school nonsense, I'll share a few highlights of the trip home:
- Wicked in S.F. at the Orpheum was amazing; being there with parents and almost all the kids was beyond words.
- Going through the archives of my childhood and all the momentos: ticket stubs to plays and movies and talent shows, hundreds of birthday and thank you cards, receipts, report cards, schoolwork and more schoolwork, tons of old clothes....It was so fun! It made me feel like before I left for college I had such an enriched, great life, and I like I was a really good person. I used to have so many deep connections with people. What happened to that?
- Visiting Mrs. V! :-D
- Going on walks with my mom in the mornings.
- Seeing all my brothers and sisters and S. Stier and J Sava and everyone in my home ward of course!
It was a fun, but short, trip home.
--Gear Shift---
Got back late Sunday night to C City. Brady came over :) I gave him a present and he gave me a SUPER warm soft cuddly amazing blanket that I love. We talked and stuff, it was really good. Then Monday we were able to hang out again! Went to FHE, went hot tubbing, Monday was a great day. Tuesday was good cause I got to see Comedy of Errors with Amy at the Shakespeare festival, it was SO FUNNY! I would probably recommend that one out of all the ones I saw this season.
Anyway, the big thing I wanted to get to was last night. Brady got off work and I went over there around 9:30. Two big things happened. Are you READY for this! Well, we were downstairs talking and I knew he had something to tell me. He started going on about how amazing he feels like I am and then he said he loved me! So yeah, that big L word.
Then, I finally shared all the unwonderfulness about me and he took everything really great about the ED and everything is really open and we talked about it for a long time and I told him if he ever wants to ask me anything about it that he should and I gave him a short history and yeah. It was good...so far.
But before all that school nonsense, I'll share a few highlights of the trip home:
- Wicked in S.F. at the Orpheum was amazing; being there with parents and almost all the kids was beyond words.
- Going through the archives of my childhood and all the momentos: ticket stubs to plays and movies and talent shows, hundreds of birthday and thank you cards, receipts, report cards, schoolwork and more schoolwork, tons of old clothes....It was so fun! It made me feel like before I left for college I had such an enriched, great life, and I like I was a really good person. I used to have so many deep connections with people. What happened to that?
- Visiting Mrs. V! :-D
- Going on walks with my mom in the mornings.
- Seeing all my brothers and sisters and S. Stier and J Sava and everyone in my home ward of course!
It was a fun, but short, trip home.
--Gear Shift---
Got back late Sunday night to C City. Brady came over :) I gave him a present and he gave me a SUPER warm soft cuddly amazing blanket that I love. We talked and stuff, it was really good. Then Monday we were able to hang out again! Went to FHE, went hot tubbing, Monday was a great day. Tuesday was good cause I got to see Comedy of Errors with Amy at the Shakespeare festival, it was SO FUNNY! I would probably recommend that one out of all the ones I saw this season.
Anyway, the big thing I wanted to get to was last night. Brady got off work and I went over there around 9:30. Two big things happened. Are you READY for this! Well, we were downstairs talking and I knew he had something to tell me. He started going on about how amazing he feels like I am and then he said he loved me! So yeah, that big L word.
Then, I finally shared all the unwonderfulness about me and he took everything really great about the ED and everything is really open and we talked about it for a long time and I told him if he ever wants to ask me anything about it that he should and I gave him a short history and yeah. It was good...so far.
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Now for a Happy One: B-Rad is the Man
As has been previously discussed, B-rad is simply amazing. I have already pontificated upon our many fun adventures, however I would like to deliver somewhat of an explanation about who he is as a person.
B-rad grew up in C. City. In high school, he was in the top choir, and his senior year he got voted as the Best Bass singer. He has a brother, Hank, and a sister, Tiffany (who is married). B-rad works at G-House as a server. His dad is an attorney, his mom is an elementary school teacher.
B-rad went to Hamburg, Germany on his mish. He has told me that previous to his mish, he was a very negative person, and that changed a lot while on his mission. He now is extremely positive, and he says that positivity and happiness is the most attractive feature about a girl to him. He is a pro at table tennis, and his paddle cost him like $150! So I want to be good at it now, too. But he hasn't played with me yet, and I don't blame him cause I'm awful, but seriously, I want to get good!
B-rad is extremely confident. He makes a lot of hand gestures while talking about something he is passionate about, and I have started to aquire the habit. B-rad laughs at my humor and this is one of the most amazing things because I don't think any guy I've dated has really done that, so I love it and him laughing makes me laugh.
B-rad treats me like I'm the most amazing thing that's ever happened to him. And it is a good feeling. He sees me like I wish I could see myself, he sees me in a way that reminds me of how God sees me.
Monday night he said to me, "Today was such a good day for X, X, and X reasons. And also at Wal-Mart there was a lady in a wheelchair that was putting the groceries on the counter, and I helped her because I thought, 'If it were Diana, she would help her.' So I helped her and it made me happy."
Really, do better compliments exist?
B-rad leaves me notes on my car while I am at work. He takes me home when I am tired. (I.e. last night, lol...this whole dating thing can catch up to a girl!)
Last night he said that he felt like the Lord had led him to me and he hasn't really felt like this before. I agreed.
B-rad tells me what's what when I need to hear it.
He is a super hot smokin man!
B-rad grew up in C. City. In high school, he was in the top choir, and his senior year he got voted as the Best Bass singer. He has a brother, Hank, and a sister, Tiffany (who is married). B-rad works at G-House as a server. His dad is an attorney, his mom is an elementary school teacher.
B-rad went to Hamburg, Germany on his mish. He has told me that previous to his mish, he was a very negative person, and that changed a lot while on his mission. He now is extremely positive, and he says that positivity and happiness is the most attractive feature about a girl to him. He is a pro at table tennis, and his paddle cost him like $150! So I want to be good at it now, too. But he hasn't played with me yet, and I don't blame him cause I'm awful, but seriously, I want to get good!
B-rad is extremely confident. He makes a lot of hand gestures while talking about something he is passionate about, and I have started to aquire the habit. B-rad laughs at my humor and this is one of the most amazing things because I don't think any guy I've dated has really done that, so I love it and him laughing makes me laugh.
B-rad treats me like I'm the most amazing thing that's ever happened to him. And it is a good feeling. He sees me like I wish I could see myself, he sees me in a way that reminds me of how God sees me.
Monday night he said to me, "Today was such a good day for X, X, and X reasons. And also at Wal-Mart there was a lady in a wheelchair that was putting the groceries on the counter, and I helped her because I thought, 'If it were Diana, she would help her.' So I helped her and it made me happy."
Really, do better compliments exist?
B-rad leaves me notes on my car while I am at work. He takes me home when I am tired. (I.e. last night, lol...this whole dating thing can catch up to a girl!)
Last night he said that he felt like the Lord had led him to me and he hasn't really felt like this before. I agreed.
B-rad tells me what's what when I need to hear it.
He is a super hot smokin man!
Let's Be Honest
Yesterday was not the greatest in terms of the ED. And I am getting a cold sore. :(
This is not the first time a small Herpes symplex II (or is it I?) symptom has presented itself upon my beautifully formed lips (lol) in consequence to my anticipation to visiting Home. After briefly discussing the matter with B-rad, he says sometimes he feels stress even when he is looking forward to something happy and exciting. Exciting stress? I dunno.
Consciously, I am EXTREMELY excited to visit Home. Not only is it one of the most beautiful places in the country, not only am I going to have the pleasure of gracing my presence to my amazing BROTHA which I haven't been able to do for nearly a year, not only will I be able to hug and snuggle for hours upon end with my beautiful hot smokin gorgeous lovely caring sisters, not only will Cat and Dyl tell me everything that is going on in their lives, not only will I be enveloped with love by my parents, but I will get to see Wicked in S.F., I will get to go to an A's game, I will get to see The Time Traveller's Wife (oh, Eric Bana you are so hot), I will get to visit Mrs. V, I will get to go to my home ward (twice!) I am just SO LUCKY!
Can't wait.
But still. In the depths of my mind, there are gloomy worries. What will I do without any structure? How will I react to being in the setting that so much despairing time passed at one point? My somewhat bleak perspective is that any, however small, positive changes I have made for myself will end up shattered and I will once again be at the start. It would not be so bad if it just affected me. However, it affects my parents. My siblings. All of our relationships.
I just want to keep busy and have fun next week and not worry about that.
This is not the first time a small Herpes symplex II (or is it I?) symptom has presented itself upon my beautifully formed lips (lol) in consequence to my anticipation to visiting Home. After briefly discussing the matter with B-rad, he says sometimes he feels stress even when he is looking forward to something happy and exciting. Exciting stress? I dunno.
Consciously, I am EXTREMELY excited to visit Home. Not only is it one of the most beautiful places in the country, not only am I going to have the pleasure of gracing my presence to my amazing BROTHA which I haven't been able to do for nearly a year, not only will I be able to hug and snuggle for hours upon end with my beautiful hot smokin gorgeous lovely caring sisters, not only will Cat and Dyl tell me everything that is going on in their lives, not only will I be enveloped with love by my parents, but I will get to see Wicked in S.F., I will get to go to an A's game, I will get to see The Time Traveller's Wife (oh, Eric Bana you are so hot), I will get to visit Mrs. V, I will get to go to my home ward (twice!) I am just SO LUCKY!
Can't wait.
But still. In the depths of my mind, there are gloomy worries. What will I do without any structure? How will I react to being in the setting that so much despairing time passed at one point? My somewhat bleak perspective is that any, however small, positive changes I have made for myself will end up shattered and I will once again be at the start. It would not be so bad if it just affected me. However, it affects my parents. My siblings. All of our relationships.
I just want to keep busy and have fun next week and not worry about that.
Monday, August 10, 2009
On Home...
I am going home on Thursday. Will update more about that tomorrow. Just wanted to throw that out there!
Balderdash, Bowling, and Basking...
in the sun while cloud watching. Ah, life is amazing. Short recap of this weekend: Four wheeling. Picnic. Cloud Watching. Talking, laughing helping. OMGOSH it was SOOO funny: After four wheeling at Yankee Meadows, B-rad and I decided to go to Parowan and lay a blanket out and cloud watch. (Was my idea, p.s.). As we get out of his ah-sum truck, we hear this old guy across the street yelling for help! I was like, B-rad, let's go help him out. His electronic wheelchair had gotten stuck in the dirt and B-rad saved the day and pushed him out! Apparently that man had been stuck for 1.5 hrs, but it only took us a few minutes to help him. We were freaking CRACKING UP about it as we cloud watched...I dunno, is that mean? That poor guy all helpless...but we were definitely happy to have helped him!!
Got home at 4:30 p.m., showered, beautified, Pastry Pub'd (B-rad had never been there so I took 'im). Fireproofed/massaged. BOWLED with L.C. and Ryan. Bowling was way fun. Ain't better days made than the one I had on Saturday.
Sunday: I woke up early to prepare my talk because I had had literally no time the whole past week. Walked in 5 minutes late :-( It's okay though, I looked amazing at least. And that is saying something coming from myself! I am my own worst critic! My talk on prayer went really, really well. Many people came up to me after the meeting telling me how great it was. I used this poem in it, and I couldn't make it through without crying. After the block, one girl came up and told me about her nonmember friend who listened to my talk and afterwards remarked that it was like, the best thing he had ever heard. I felt so blessed and touched. It is things like that that remind me how much love the Lord has for me.
After church, went and helped B-rad's mom prep dinner. B-rad and I read, "You Are Special" and I cried and he almost cried also. Then we began to read Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe, because I told him of my desires to read to my children all the time when I am a mother. We are going to switch off who reads aloud between chapters. It will be really good because those books are so symbolic and analogous to the Gospel.
Fireside last night. Kindof awk. because the guy talked about marriage and was like, "don't give backrubs bla bla bla" Dude. B-rad and I have been so good, don't make us feel guilty for nothing we did. Personally, I don't think there is anything wrong with backrubs. >:O
Played Balderdash last night at The Big Fun House. I came in 2nd to last. Lol, that game is hard, but now that I know some strategy I think I'd do better. After we all played, the Boys went and played R.B. and the Girls went and chatted it up about all the Drama.
So, there is a girl that is madly in love with B-rad. She didn't even stay in Sunday School yesterday because he and I were sitting with each other. She is pretty fragile. But anyway, there is just drama with her and jacob and ryan (two of B-rad's good friends). And then David (I saw Henry V with) was all touching my elbow and sat next to me and totally shut B-rad down last night. Frankly, the competition is hilarious to watch, in my opinion. But the convo was SOOOOOOO great; I love Deb and R-Stah now!
Saw J this morning. :D Made some goals. 875. No sca. Mom myself. Those are code words for my goals I am so trickyyyyyy. I recapped the past couple weeks for her...I can't believe how much has happened in such a short time. Love talking to J. A lot. A lot. A lot. You get the picture.
My Children Will Be Named:
Elle/Ellie
Grace/Gracie
Jane/Janey
Claire
Harris
Clark
Rockstar (lol, maybe not. but i will call all my boys my rockstars. and their hair will be done in faux-hawks)
Tagg. or Moses. or Noah.
Those are my favorite names today. :-D
Got home at 4:30 p.m., showered, beautified, Pastry Pub'd (B-rad had never been there so I took 'im). Fireproofed/massaged. BOWLED with L.C. and Ryan. Bowling was way fun. Ain't better days made than the one I had on Saturday.
Sunday: I woke up early to prepare my talk because I had had literally no time the whole past week. Walked in 5 minutes late :-( It's okay though, I looked amazing at least. And that is saying something coming from myself! I am my own worst critic! My talk on prayer went really, really well. Many people came up to me after the meeting telling me how great it was. I used this poem in it, and I couldn't make it through without crying. After the block, one girl came up and told me about her nonmember friend who listened to my talk and afterwards remarked that it was like, the best thing he had ever heard. I felt so blessed and touched. It is things like that that remind me how much love the Lord has for me.
After church, went and helped B-rad's mom prep dinner. B-rad and I read, "You Are Special" and I cried and he almost cried also. Then we began to read Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe, because I told him of my desires to read to my children all the time when I am a mother. We are going to switch off who reads aloud between chapters. It will be really good because those books are so symbolic and analogous to the Gospel.
Fireside last night. Kindof awk. because the guy talked about marriage and was like, "don't give backrubs bla bla bla" Dude. B-rad and I have been so good, don't make us feel guilty for nothing we did. Personally, I don't think there is anything wrong with backrubs. >:O
Played Balderdash last night at The Big Fun House. I came in 2nd to last. Lol, that game is hard, but now that I know some strategy I think I'd do better. After we all played, the Boys went and played R.B. and the Girls went and chatted it up about all the Drama.
So, there is a girl that is madly in love with B-rad. She didn't even stay in Sunday School yesterday because he and I were sitting with each other. She is pretty fragile. But anyway, there is just drama with her and jacob and ryan (two of B-rad's good friends). And then David (I saw Henry V with) was all touching my elbow and sat next to me and totally shut B-rad down last night. Frankly, the competition is hilarious to watch, in my opinion. But the convo was SOOOOOOO great; I love Deb and R-Stah now!
Saw J this morning. :D Made some goals. 875. No sca. Mom myself. Those are code words for my goals I am so trickyyyyyy. I recapped the past couple weeks for her...I can't believe how much has happened in such a short time. Love talking to J. A lot. A lot. A lot. You get the picture.
My Children Will Be Named:
Elle/Ellie
Grace/Gracie
Jane/Janey
Claire
Harris
Clark
Rockstar (lol, maybe not. but i will call all my boys my rockstars. and their hair will be done in faux-hawks)
Tagg. or Moses. or Noah.
Those are my favorite names today. :-D
Thursday, August 6, 2009
It is interesting...
writing a blog. Because you never really know who is reading it. I know my sisters/mom/other people read it when I adamantly demand that they do, but I've gotten a few comments on facebook about some other friends reading it and it was a pleasant little surprise! However, that being said, it also makes me wonder how much to share! Obviously if only people read it that I know are reading it, I can write just about anything I want to share with that audience. But I think I am just going to be open. :-)
Last night was so so so so fun. Went to bed at 2 a.m., woke up at 7:25 (after hitting snooze twice), and babysat from 8:30-10:30. So you can see I may be somewhat petered out, but I will continue nonetheless (I know, you are just dying for me to continue ;-) ) ANYWAY, so yes, Wednesday night=movie night at The Big Fun House. We watched Dial M for Murder (a classic Alfred Hitchcock film). I really enjoyed it! I love watching old classic movies, especially with great friends. Brady got there during intermission. Mmmmm :) When the movie ended, everyone chatted for awhile and it was almost midnight so I decided to head home.
Brady walked me to Car.
But the most fun part of the night was when we were outside, we had a little tiff. We were both like, shouting and laughing at each other and wrestling and I was basically hanging on him and at one point he pretty much dropped me and my knee hurts! and I told him I was going to kick him in the privates but he said I would never do that and I didn't but I did bite his shoulder at one point I think and I climbed on him and yelled some more and probably all the neighbors were wondering what the heck was going on but we were yelling and laughing at each other the whole time and it was really fun the end.
:-D
Last night was so so so so fun. Went to bed at 2 a.m., woke up at 7:25 (after hitting snooze twice), and babysat from 8:30-10:30. So you can see I may be somewhat petered out, but I will continue nonetheless (I know, you are just dying for me to continue ;-) ) ANYWAY, so yes, Wednesday night=movie night at The Big Fun House. We watched Dial M for Murder (a classic Alfred Hitchcock film). I really enjoyed it! I love watching old classic movies, especially with great friends. Brady got there during intermission. Mmmmm :) When the movie ended, everyone chatted for awhile and it was almost midnight so I decided to head home.
Brady walked me to Car.
But the most fun part of the night was when we were outside, we had a little tiff. We were both like, shouting and laughing at each other and wrestling and I was basically hanging on him and at one point he pretty much dropped me and my knee hurts! and I told him I was going to kick him in the privates but he said I would never do that and I didn't but I did bite his shoulder at one point I think and I climbed on him and yelled some more and probably all the neighbors were wondering what the heck was going on but we were yelling and laughing at each other the whole time and it was really fun the end.
:-D
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
It Is Nice....
1) It is nice that the C City Public Library has a grace period of 10 days. But doesn't that defeat the purpose of a "due date?"
2) It is nice that I went to lunch with B-rad today.
3) It is nice that my lab is over.
4) It is nice to have good parents that take care of me.
5) It is nice to have such beautiful weather.
6) It is nice that tonight is Wednesday= movie night at the Big Fun House! (last time we watched Bandits...)
7) It is nice that this morning babysitting the lil uns' went fantastically and Carter made me a bracelet!! SOOO CUTE!
8) It is nice that I am going home in so soon.
9) It is nice that I love my Saab-y :-)
10) It is nice that my office is not an icebox today!
It is not nice....
1) That two weeks is a long time to go without talking to J!
2) That a certain number is lower than it should be!
3) That this whole dating thing is really catching up to me, and I am pretty wiped out today. Nap after work? I dunno! I hate it, cause i really need to especially if we are staying out late tonight and I have to babysit at 8:30 tomorrow morning. Hmmm :-/ Advice?
2) It is nice that I went to lunch with B-rad today.
3) It is nice that my lab is over.
4) It is nice to have good parents that take care of me.
5) It is nice to have such beautiful weather.
6) It is nice that tonight is Wednesday= movie night at the Big Fun House! (last time we watched Bandits...)
7) It is nice that this morning babysitting the lil uns' went fantastically and Carter made me a bracelet!! SOOO CUTE!
8) It is nice that I am going home in so soon.
9) It is nice that I love my Saab-y :-)
10) It is nice that my office is not an icebox today!
It is not nice....
1) That two weeks is a long time to go without talking to J!
2) That a certain number is lower than it should be!
3) That this whole dating thing is really catching up to me, and I am pretty wiped out today. Nap after work? I dunno! I hate it, cause i really need to especially if we are staying out late tonight and I have to babysit at 8:30 tomorrow morning. Hmmm :-/ Advice?
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Life is SO GOOD!
Oh me oh my, where do I begin!? I have not been this happy in a long time!!! Everything in life is amazing. Seriously. I was never one for sappy love stories or butterflies in my tummy or even believing that those kinds of feelings were really, truly out there. I was always one who was skeptical of girls imparting their experiences and thinking, "How lame, insincere, and just plain sappy."
But alas, it has happened to me. I never thought it would. Ever. And now all I can say is, it is AMAZING and EVERY girl should have the opportunity to feel this way. Let me give you a rundown of the past few days:
Like I said in my previous post, B-rad and I drove up to Salt Lake City on Thursday afternoon. He picked me up from work at about 3:30 p.m. and off we were. We had the BEST time EVER! We sang our hearts out to Backstreet Boys (more on his singing later!). We talked about important things, like how we feel about interpersonal communication styles and we talked about the book "The Five Languages of Love." Wonderfully enough, we both have the same primary love language. And trust me, it works out ;-) But we really had the most amazing conversation on the way up. Anyway, so we get to the reception and it was fun! It was fun hearing him speak German and meet his mission companions, and there was lots of yummy fruit! The reception was really nice. Thereafter, we skiddadled on over to Temple Square where we picked my momma up from a music conference event and then we all went to Spoon Me! :-) and B-rad and my momma chatted and then we dropped her off and started the drive back to C. City from the SLC. Again, the drive was amazing.
B-rad SANG TO ME. ACAPELLA. Can you say heart melt?
K. So we got back Friday morning at 3 a.m. Next day at work, he comes and visits me. What did I do after work that day? I am trying to remember. But I can't? Hmm! Weird. But when he got off work at 11:30 we hung out and watched Dan in Real Life and *sigh* he brought me back home around 1:30 a.m. on Saturday morning. Don't stop reading yet! So that was The First Kiss. Oh, it was beautiful. It was Perfect.
At this point, you can see how I would be slightly sleep deprived. Usually, if I feel tired even a smidge I will politely reject any social invitations. But, no. 7:15 a.m., Saturday morning. B-rad picks me up (he had to wait a few minutes, I needed to brush los dientes), and we head up to Provo with his parents and older brother Hank. This was the first opportunity I had had to meet the 'rents, and they are fantastic! His mom is the loveliest little lady and his dad I can tell has lived a fun life! So, anyway, Provo was way fun. While they took family pictures, I got to spend some time with Justine and we walked around the park and talked :) Promptly thereafter, we had to leave because B-rad had to work at 3:30 and I had to babysit from 4-8. So then we each did our individual things (babysitting went splendidly, of course...told the kids a made-up story about a snail named Murphy who was a ping-pong player), B-rad and I hung out again! We went over to his good friend Riley's house. Riley is married, and Amber and I get along really great! We watched Les Mis, even though I was falling asleep kinda at the end. But I LOOOOVE that movie, and I love that B-rad loves it, too, and he loves all musicals :-)
Sunday: Church at 11, he picked me up. We both shared our testimonies in Sacrament meeting because on our lengthy drives, we had discussed quite a few gospel concepts, which is such a great way to prepare to bear one's testimony. I don't know if people thought it was sappy or not that we were like, sitting next to eachother and rubbing eachother's backs and we got up almost in succession (he went before the person before me). I felt like it felt perfect, sitting next to him in church with his arm around me. We laughed together during the hymns. We whispered. Everything about it is wonderful. After church, we had dinner with his family. Fireside that night. Same deal-- laughing, talking. That night we went over to his sister Tiffani's house and played Uno Attack. I won one! Then, they went to watch The Next Food Network Star and we went again to Riley's house and Amber and I made blondies and then we watched Brian Reagan.
Oh oh oh! But do not forget! Before we went to Riley's, we went on a short walk up Northfield Rd (because Riley and Tiffany both live in apts along there), and we went on swings and B-rad put his hands on my hips and kissed me and told me he really wanted to be exclusive. Hmm. Ok, obviously I said yes. He took me home at midnight.
Yesterday, (Monday), he was worked closing and I was planning on going to a baseball game with some friends from the ward (which was EXTREMELY FUN!) but before Heather, Kaelee, B-Hen, Johnny and I headed to St. G, I left B-rad a note and some Starbursts in his truck :-) Upon his discovery of candy and note, I recieved the following text (ok, try not to gag):
"I have the most amazing, fun, good looking, positive, friendly, sweet, thoughtful, outstanding, nice, loving, incredibly girlfriend ever!!!!" (exclamation marks were also included)
*Sigh* So then, of course, we couldn't go a day without seeing eachother, so got back from the game at 11:30 p.m. (The RoadRunners won!!) and then he picked me up on his moped at 11:45. We talked. We planned.
We have a million fun things to do planned. He brings out the best in me. He compliments me like, on everything. We have so much fun. Oh, last night he also sang to me :-) Every girl deserves this.
We have a million fun things to do planned. He brings out the best in me. He compliments me like, on everything. We have so much fun. Oh, last night he also sang to me :-) Every girl deserves this.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Heapfuls of Happiness
Sometimes I really wonder how I ever deserved to be so blessed. This summer has been so fantastic and wonderful that I just feel enveloped in blessings and fun. Isn't that a cool visualization-- being wrapped up in so many things to be grateful for and having so much fun? It's almost too much to handle, believing that I am really living it and that for some reason or another Heavenly Father has given me this amazing time. It is a testament to me that He does care and that I really have a lot of serving and loving to do in order to somehow show Him that I appreciate it!
Last night Brady and I went and saw The Secret Garden at the Shakespeare Festival, (many thanks to my momma for giving Brady such an awesome tip on Monday!). It was lots and lots and lots of fun! B-rad is so much fun to be around and he is super sweet! Tonight we are driving to Salt Lake because his mission companion is having a wedding reception, and following that we are going to pick my mom up from her rehearsal with the MoTab and maybe go to Spoon Me! Oh boy oh boy Spoon Me is fantastic :) That will be loads of fun!
Anyway, not much else going on. I wish I had some hilarious anecdote to impart with you dear read, but I do not....just a whole lotta love goin' out to ya!
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
B-b-b-b-benny and the jets....
This morning, took the lil kiddos to the library. We read. We loved it. They were so good, in fact, that we then went to D.I. and the kids picked out some $.50 toys. Being with them brings me back to the simple things in life. Seriously, they get super excited over such small things! It was really fun just looking at toys and playing with them in D.I. hahaha. I am pretty grateful to have such awesome jobs this summer.
Ok, so quick rundown of the past week 'cause it has been one of the best weeks of the best summer so far. So I saw C-Bunch on Tuesday like I said, and then last Wednesday a bunch of guys from my ward got together (at this AWESOME house) and we watched Bandit's on a projector. I totally recommend that movie! It was really original and way funny. Anyway, one of the guys there was Brady, one was Jacob (one of Brady's BF's), and David (Jacob's older brother). We had tons of fun hanging out!
Okay, so then Thursday night I hung out with Devin and we played a game called Nardy; it's very similar to backgammon and he got it in Armenia on his mission. We played til about midnight! Way fun! Anyway, he invited me to go to a concert with them on Friday night, but I had already told Amy I would watch Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants 2 with her Friday night. That was alright...sometimes it is frustrating dealing with her time schedule, but it worked out and it was totally worth it 'cause I LOVE THAT MOVIE!!! Haha...
K, so then Saturday I babysat from 2-7 which was wonderful and I just adore spending time with those kids!! They are so dang cute and we had loads of fun traipsing around downtown Cedar and the SUU campus :-)
Blah blah blah, okay, so Saturday night I got to go see Henry V at the Shakespeare Festival here in town! David (one of the guys I hung out with on Wednesday) took me to go see it and it was REALLY good. Like, seriously good. I was pretty worn out from the long day, and the play was three hours long, but the actors were phenomenal and I am totally lucky to have had the chance to see it!
Sunday...OMGOSH this day was super super good. So Brady and I had been texting back and forth a little bit since the first time we hung out (last Wednesday, 6 days ago). We ended up going to the fireside together (which was remarkable, by the way) and then around 8 a bunch of guys (mostly the same people from the group last Wednesday) were getting together to play Apples to Apples! It was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much fun. There were like 10 people total I think? Brady, Jacob, David, Fish, Brian, Deb, Rachel, Shari, and me. Ok so 9. And yeah, it was pretty much an awesome time had by all. We played til midnight and then Brady, Jacob, David, and I went to Wendy's (after the Sabbath ;-)). Yum. We ate at a park with swings and then we were all pretty tired to I went to bed. SUPER fun time.
Yesterday was also amazingly fun. Double whammy in the morning seeing J (which was the best, like always!) and then C, the D. C was not helpful, UGH. I could practically feel the frustration dripping off her...she is definitely an ED virgin. So will I see her again? Hmm, probably not. But I won't see J again for 13. more. days. That's a long time. Boo :(
Ok, so then went to lab where we took some rotten-egg smelling acid and refluxed it with some ethanol to make pineappley smelling stuff!!!! Isn't that so cool!? Tell me O chem isn't cool. Me=nerd maybe a little bit? You know you like it.
THEN, GUESS WHO I GOT TO SEE!?! MY MOM AND CAT! (Short for Cathryn, the baby of the family). lksndflksndflksnflknsd it was great to spend an hour and a half with them. For REALLSSSSS. Cat is soooo big now and SUPER TAN AND DARK!!!! Definitely an inspiration for me to tan more hahaha. *Sigh* It was amazing seeing them : ) Talked to my mom lots and we went to Garden House for lunch and Brady was our server :) Him and my mom talked in German because they both went to Hamburg, Germany on their missions. I was sad that they had to leave so soon, but my mom had to get up north for her BYU music conference. It will be phenomenal going home on the 13th...I get to stay for 10 days!
Anyway, that is mostly everything that has happened in the past week. Last night=FHE and Bachelorette! and tonight is the Bachelorette "after show." Goooood times.
Ok, so quick rundown of the past week 'cause it has been one of the best weeks of the best summer so far. So I saw C-Bunch on Tuesday like I said, and then last Wednesday a bunch of guys from my ward got together (at this AWESOME house) and we watched Bandit's on a projector. I totally recommend that movie! It was really original and way funny. Anyway, one of the guys there was Brady, one was Jacob (one of Brady's BF's), and David (Jacob's older brother). We had tons of fun hanging out!
Okay, so then Thursday night I hung out with Devin and we played a game called Nardy; it's very similar to backgammon and he got it in Armenia on his mission. We played til about midnight! Way fun! Anyway, he invited me to go to a concert with them on Friday night, but I had already told Amy I would watch Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants 2 with her Friday night. That was alright...sometimes it is frustrating dealing with her time schedule, but it worked out and it was totally worth it 'cause I LOVE THAT MOVIE!!! Haha...
K, so then Saturday I babysat from 2-7 which was wonderful and I just adore spending time with those kids!! They are so dang cute and we had loads of fun traipsing around downtown Cedar and the SUU campus :-)
Blah blah blah, okay, so Saturday night I got to go see Henry V at the Shakespeare Festival here in town! David (one of the guys I hung out with on Wednesday) took me to go see it and it was REALLY good. Like, seriously good. I was pretty worn out from the long day, and the play was three hours long, but the actors were phenomenal and I am totally lucky to have had the chance to see it!
Sunday...OMGOSH this day was super super good. So Brady and I had been texting back and forth a little bit since the first time we hung out (last Wednesday, 6 days ago). We ended up going to the fireside together (which was remarkable, by the way) and then around 8 a bunch of guys (mostly the same people from the group last Wednesday) were getting together to play Apples to Apples! It was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much fun. There were like 10 people total I think? Brady, Jacob, David, Fish, Brian, Deb, Rachel, Shari, and me. Ok so 9. And yeah, it was pretty much an awesome time had by all. We played til midnight and then Brady, Jacob, David, and I went to Wendy's (after the Sabbath ;-)). Yum. We ate at a park with swings and then we were all pretty tired to I went to bed. SUPER fun time.
Yesterday was also amazingly fun. Double whammy in the morning seeing J (which was the best, like always!) and then C, the D. C was not helpful, UGH. I could practically feel the frustration dripping off her...she is definitely an ED virgin. So will I see her again? Hmm, probably not. But I won't see J again for 13. more. days. That's a long time. Boo :(
Ok, so then went to lab where we took some rotten-egg smelling acid and refluxed it with some ethanol to make pineappley smelling stuff!!!! Isn't that so cool!? Tell me O chem isn't cool. Me=nerd maybe a little bit? You know you like it.
THEN, GUESS WHO I GOT TO SEE!?! MY MOM AND CAT! (Short for Cathryn, the baby of the family). lksndflksndflksnflknsd it was great to spend an hour and a half with them. For REALLSSSSS. Cat is soooo big now and SUPER TAN AND DARK!!!! Definitely an inspiration for me to tan more hahaha. *Sigh* It was amazing seeing them : ) Talked to my mom lots and we went to Garden House for lunch and Brady was our server :) Him and my mom talked in German because they both went to Hamburg, Germany on their missions. I was sad that they had to leave so soon, but my mom had to get up north for her BYU music conference. It will be phenomenal going home on the 13th...I get to stay for 10 days!
Anyway, that is mostly everything that has happened in the past week. Last night=FHE and Bachelorette! and tonight is the Bachelorette "after show." Goooood times.
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
On old high school friends and more...
Damn. I can never think of good titles.
Anyway, last night a super good old friend from high school was in CC-town on a road trip through the ol' US of A on her way to grad school across the country, and so we went to Pastry Pub and talked a TON and it was GRAND! None other than my favorite C-Bunch! :-DDDD It was incredibly refreshing to get to spend an uninterrupted 2.5 hours talking with her. I felt like I could have talked to her all night long, but they were getting up early this morning. Anyway, we discussed her roadtrip, her college plans, how the summer has been going, and we also talked for a long time about the lil' uns each of us nanny(ied) for...and a ton of other stuff.... I just love good conversations like that. I miss that feeling of being able to talk to people for so long and so naturally and just being yourself and loving every minute of being with someone. She is such an amazing person and a good friend, and that was something I definitely needed last night.
I don't know what I want to do with my life now. Be a teacher? Apply to cell molec grad programs? I am also feeling pretty interested in neuroscience grad programs which will also pay a stipend, so maybe I'll do that? Who knows.
Sigh. Something else I've been thinking about is how when I was younger, I never questioned my ability to do anything. I never questioned whether or not I was a good leader, or a good communicator, or whether I would be good enough as me. Now, I feel like I am constantly questioning and even criticizing all these characteristics. It is one thing to constructively criticize in order for improvement to occur, but now it is to the point of just never feeling like it will ever be enough. Will it ever be enough? When that answer is no, that is just one big truck running over you. Yes sirrees, that is a Megatron-sized semi truck pounding you straight into the tar on the hot pavement (I am a huge Transformers fan; let's all face it--Shia LeBeouf is hot diggity).
So how do we sort through all the jumbled data we have in our minds--some pointing to the results that we ARE good enough, some data pointing to the result that we ARE NOT good enough-- and come to a conclusion?
Friday, July 17, 2009
I'm trying to think of a clever way to say...
I am freaking tired. What is wrong with me!? It is summer. I haven't been tired since...well, since sometime last semester. During school. Which is not unusual during the school year. But during the summer!? Boo.
Could this be due to the fact that for the past week I have stayed up ridiculously late reading The Book Thief? Possibly. It is an incredibly absorbing piece of literature. I highly recommend it.
At any rate, right now I am at work. And there has been a girl here for over an hour using our shredder and it is exceedingly annoying. Especially since I have things to shred! Like 5 pages! Haha well she can take all the time she needs. I suppose. Since, ya know, it's like, my shredder and everything.
Yesterday I had a moment where I remembered what feeling happy and carefree was all about. It was fleeting.
This is pretty much a short entry, but lastly I just want to mention how AMAAAAZING my mom is. She is like, an anchor and emotional support for me. We always talk on Sunday nights. And it is one of my favorite rituals of the week, unquestionably. She is super wise and really teaches me how to just chill out and not stress and just be a good person and always reminds me of the things that are the most important. She is such an amazing person! She has had seven kids and has taught us all so much about living the gospel and serving others wholeheartedly with your talents and just being a good person. I can't say enough good things about her. She has sacrificed so much for me and for all my brothers and sisters. She is such a good example to me of being patient with my brothers and sisters and me as we go through our own personal trials. She supports me and loves me no matter how many dumb things I do! Not only that, but she'll still give me bites off her plate :-) (like I said, sacrifice!) She has exposed me to so many things so I am such a more cultured person. I love musicals! I love that she loves me.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
PF Flyers > Converse
So, I'm still kindof getting this thing started. I promise, in the future, there will be a plethora of pictures from my real life and that will make everything just so much more interesting (sarcasm). Anyway, today I would like to address an issue that has been on my mind for a few days. And that is the fact that I have an ego about what kind of shoes I wear! OK, who doesn't?! Next time you're at the mall, count how many people you pass who are wearing Converse shoes; your counting skills need to be adept because trust me, you will be counting some pretty high numbers.
Now, next time you go to some public place, count the number of people who are wearing PF Flyers. Hardly anyone. And that is why, to me, they are awesome. I love wearing my PF Flyers. (I have a natural colored pair and am getting a new red pair in the mail today!)
At any rate, an update on life. Things are suuuuuuuuuuuuuper amazing. I wish this summer could last forever! Saw Harry Potter 6 last night with H. L. and B.C. It was really fun to hang out with them. Tonight I am babysitting for a girl I work with. Tomorrow morning nannying. Work. Tomorrow night doing O Chem w/ Darren for long hours. Saturday I am tutoring my boss's daughter in algebra. And Saturday night I am nannying again.
Not much else going on.
I guess, on a final note, I'll conclude with some thoughts that go along with my blog theme of getting run over once in awhilein the game of Frogger. You see, sometimes the metaphorical "truck" that runs us over can sometimes be our own thoughts and ideas, criticizing ourselves or just being really hard on ourselves! For me, it used to be a lot more subconscious, I wouldn't even realize I was doing it! And I know that it's like that for a lot of people. But (I think it was) yesterday, and I just very momentarily glanced at a picture of myself from graduation and just had some really bad thoughts about how awful I thought I looked in it and it was really depressing! Sad, huh? And moments later I targeted those thoughts as being really unconstructive (is that a word?), and that it was a metaphorical car that squashed me and made me feel all bad. (A car because it wasn't as big and bad as a truck ha). Anyway, I think it helps to realize when we do this to ourselves so that we can stop it from happening in the future :)
Peace yo, i'm out. (Probably to continue looking at really cute clothes :-P )
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
The Initial Post: Like An Awkward Meeting
Oh yes, because that is always, unquestionably, what the first post is equivalent to. It is like an awkward meeting, one in which you know the person you're meeting has already heard about you, but you have no idea what they're like, and you have heard about them, but your persons do not have anything in common, and the Silent Moment happens, and beyond that it is just a get-me-out-of-here situation.
But hopefully blogging won't feel like that for long. :)
It just seems that way because in one's first blog post, one typically begins by explaining why they started a blog in the first place, yadda yadda yadda...then they generally continue with what they want to write about all the time, etc. etc. etc. and what their blog is meant for, i.e. "an emotional outlet," a "place to share recipes," or, the classic example, "to record the daily going-ons in our growing household that is filled with love 24/7." Well, seeing as I am not using this as a tool to share recipes (although I cannot guarantee that will not happen at one future point or another), and I am, in fact, not using this blog to share the details of a growing household, I don't really have a specific goal in mind for my (hopefully) many posts yet to follow. I can, however, guarantee your readership satisfaction in that it will be unmatchably interesting and that my every word will have you dying for more!
Kidding!
But really, why the frogger blogger? OK, when I was in my youth, oh-so-long-ago (err, a few years, maybe?), we had a pretty old school game AKA Frogger. And having spent hours upon hours trying to beat it (which never did happen, incidentally), I know a thing or two about getting squashed. Running into obstacles. Hopping onto lily pads to try to get to the other side, only to realize that it is NOT a lily pad, but rather a dangerous alligator ready to bite your head off! EEEK! Anyyyyway....
That's the dealio.
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